This is part of a series of letters Elizabeth writes to a fictional pastor. Have you read Taking Down the Ministry Pedestal or watched What We Wish Senders Knew (Senders’ version or the Goers’ version)? You can also read the full survey results in the white paper Let’s Talk About It. Once a month, Elizabeth will write to Jerry; you can find previous letters here.
Dear Pastor Jerry,
We appreciate your notes from time to time. It is such a boost to us to know that Pine Creek is standing behind us – they “have our back” to use a good English idiom. We need someone at our back because we’re plowing forward at warp speed.
You are aware that we are here in this massive city several times a year to teach at a university. While that sounds quite educationally lofty, the reality is that foreign teachers are welcomed, but not particularly valued. We’re, as it were, a necessary evil.
That doesn’t mean we don’t have deep friendships with administrators, but they feel free to use us as needed, and we’re never quite sure what is going on or what motives are behind the scenes. We often hear rumbles from one sector about another, and vice versa. What is truth? We’re not certain. Living with ambiguity becomes a way of life. We can either worry, or move forward, trusting you to have our backs, and asking the Lord to open the doors in front.
And open He does, usually over food.
Let me give you just a few examples. Sunday night a group of students came to our apartment for our usual “English discussion group.” They always come loaded with bags of snacks because it is impossible in this culture to talk without food. We put a pile of life questions on slips of paper in a hat. Each student gets to pull out one, and if they don’t like it, pull out a second. Then they have to choose and answer one of them. They are simple questions like, “What birthday present do you best remember from your childhood?” or “What do parents owe their children?” or “What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to tell someone you loved?”
What is interesting is that these questions spawn more questions, and discussion ensues. We discuss for exactly one hour and then break for snacks, and talk moves into little groups with more depth. Last Sunday night we never even got to the paper questions because it was Palm Sunday – the whole time was an intense discussion on what Easter means, and if Jesus and the Jesus story is real.
Tuesday we had lunch with Fiona – a PhD candidate we met last week when we were interviewed by the humanities department. She has applied to teach there, and was asked to sit in on our discussion with the professors to help translate as part of her interview. Over pizza, as she told us about her studies in Philosophy, and her growing dissatisfaction with the teachings of Marx, we found that she’d met Christians during her one year study abroad. In fact, it was those women who helped her find an apartment and took care of her. “But I didn’t stay long enough to get all my questions answered,” she said, “And now, I think another miracle has happened. You are here and I can ask you.”
The next day my husband was out playing baseball with Ben and his buddies at another university while I did the honors of a noodle farewell lunch for one of the other foreign teachers, a big old Brit who drinks too much. (Long noodles signify long relationships) He’s a kind-hearted man, though, a friend of years, and evidently a very good professor. On one side of me was the Brit swigging his beer, and on the other side a younger Swede swigging his beer. Across from us three administrators swigging their beers. Me – with my yogurt drink… Lots of Chinese chatter, lots of laughter, lots of joshing back and forth. Not necessarily the society I’d choose for lunch, but schmoozing over food is huge and no relationship happens without it.
Yesterday we had lunch with a former teaching assistant who now says she is a lesbian. Her plaintive question to us when we first arrived was, “Will you still be my dear friends if I am a lesbian?” It was a warm, loving time, but a hard and painful discussion. She wants to run her own life and sees absolutely no need for a spiritual side of existence. We left her with hugs and promises to stay connected, but heavy hearts. Yes, we will stay friends, but dear friends warn friends when they are heading for a cliff.
Another day it was the guy who trusted Christ a few weeks ago – he literally galloped into the Kingdom and we couldn’t hold him back. Three, four years ago, I would have said he was a wild donkey and the least likely to respond to the Lord. But this week, over coffee, we were able to connect him to a Chinese pastor who moved him forward in what he knows.
Later we met with that pastor and his wife, a wonderful young couple, for a good talk, bubble tea, and time of mentoring. And in the evening, four of our sweet young women students took us out for a “last supper.” This morning it was breakfast with a young American teacher we’re mentoring and dumpling lunch with the Chinese friend who finds us apartments and is struggling with his college age son.
So it goes. The week’s tally?
Discussions over food: probably 15
Salvations: 0
Rejections: 1
Those on the “journey to Jesus”: too many to count
After our last lecture, a young Muslim student who has attended regularly came up and thanked us warmly for being here. At first he was skittish, even afraid of us. But lecture by lecture he returned, moved further front, and began to ask if we needed any help. If the journey to Jesus is a 1-10 where 10 equals stepping into the Kingdom of God, this guy started at minus 2. But now he has met, and made friends with what are probably his first Christians. He trusts us. That moves him up to step one.
We do a lot of digging in hard soil here, and we sow a lot of seeds. Other times we’re watering and once in a great while, we actually get to catch fruit falling from the tree. It’s a powerful process, but it’s mysterious too. We’re grateful for a Father who knows so much more about people’s hearts than we can ever understand. If you watch our backs with your prayer and support, we’ll continue to trust him for the harvest.
By the way, what’s for dinner? And who are you eating with?
Until the next letter,
Elizabeth
This week is our second shark week, this time is “Shark Week for the soul.” Shame can make us want to swim to the deepest corners or pretend it’s not there. That is not God’s invitation! Join us for Shame Resilience Week where the waters are inviting and the information is digestible! It’s not too late to join in … sign up here :).
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